Search results for: “feed”

  • Chapter 118: Things to avoid when naming your pet

    The following is a non-exhaustive list of names and concepts you should avoid when naming your pet. The reasons to avoid them are many, but should be easily spotted by reading the selected Real Life Simulations of their usage below. 1. Something that sounds like a child’s description of medical symptoms or a body part.…

  • Chapter 115: Moving to Pittsburgh

    The following was written for a creative writing class I took when I was 15. I held the shaky screen door as my girlfriend walked out. We walked slowly, hand in hand, over the little grassy hill she and I had played on with our friends a long time ago. Down the driveway, where I…

  • Chapter 86: Facing the Ivory Army

    Update 8/3/06: The Related Posts feature I installed a while ago just slapped me in the face. It seems that I have already posted this chapter. Both times I was in a creative rut and was rummaging through a folder of random words written long ago. I changed the title, but to those of you…

  • Chapter 51: When faced with an army of sheep, your only choice is to run

    It was the last day of our hike through the High Uintas in northeastern Utah. We had weathered the lightning storm that echoed through the valley like the cries of some great god, lived through hiking in the hail that pelted us every step for miles on end, and could now tell stories of days…

  • Chapter 19: I am a big monkey

    That’s all I am. I stink. I have hair all over my body. I hurt myself on regular occasions by doing stupid things. I want things I can’t have, even though it should be obvious I can’t have them. I’m hungry almost all the time, and I eat what tastes good, not what’s healthy. I…