I have to start making that big decision: What am I going to major in? I’ve always wanted to do two things: program computer games, and build robots. Since I was in 8th grade I’ve made computer programs, although not as much in the last year or so. Last year I was in a school robotics team that made it to a national competition in Seattle, the highlight of that academic year. But I don’t want to spend the rest of my life behind a desk, writing code, or working on schematics. I take relief in my dad. He got two degrees out of college, industrial ceramics and a mining degree. He now is the president of a construction company that makes embassies, not exactly what he wanted or started out to be. He told me that regardless of what I come out of college with, I will end up where I want, if that’s what I really want. Your major will give you a general push, but its things inherent in you, your ability to learn and deal with new things that will ultimately decide your success. I am in college to learn HOW to learn.
That’s all I am. I stink. I have hair all over my body. I hurt myself on regular occasions by doing stupid things. I want things I can’t have, even though it should be obvious I can’t have them. I’m hungry almost all the time, and I eat what tastes good, not what’s healthy. I run from things that scare me, and I do things solely to impress others. I’m lazy, not wanting to do much more than I absolutely have to. I want to work just hard enough so I can feed myself and any chick monkeys I happen to have at the time, and trust me, as a monkey I like having chick monkeys running around all over the place. My goals are simple: have fun being me, cause that’s all I am.
I have not been around in a long time. My transition from a heterosexual to a gay transsexual was quite rapid. I now lust for Billy Blanks. Of course he must be wearing a ballerina outfit with the crotch cut out. But the sad state I am now at I am not quite sure even Sam or I could explain that. But being Sam’s lack of masculinity I will try. It all started with a shower with Big Al. Later, Al would castrate Sam after a brutal fight about whose legs were sexier. Then Sam began cross dressing, because of lack of a penis. This is more or less how I have come to be. It was not all my fault; I occasionally tell Sam messages to hit on women. Sam only responds, “NO, girls have cooties”. It’s not my fault…” ~baconthefag
Due to some confusion, this was written by a friend of mine as a parody of Fight Club and my chapters.
Somebody asked me today if I had a girlfriend, and I replied “nope.” “But why not?” they asked, and while I can’t claim I turn away an extraordinary amount of women, I can claim I won’t go out with anybody. I’m not desperate to get laid, to be loved, to party with the ladies, because that’s not everything. If you go out looking for a girlfriend, you end up finding girls who aren’t good girlfriends. If you go out with the intentions of being a nice person, and being proud of yourself and respecting others, while you might not go on many dates, you cut the hoes and soap operas out of your life.
Tonight I lost my virginity. Well, not really (the last frontier still remains unconquered), but I did attend my first Rocky Horror Picture Show event. That is something everyone must do once. I was surrounded by transvestites and women in clothing the likes of which isn’t seen outside of Fredricks of Hollywood catalogs :-). Next year I plan to go in drag, and that my friends, is damn scary.
I’ve been to theatre and symphonies, but THAT was culture. – Jason MacDonald, on returning from the Rocky Horror Picture Show